Monthly Archives: November 2008

Black Friday

Let me make this clear: if you got up early on Friday to line up outside some stupid retail hell in order to “score bargains”, you are a moron who deserves to be etched from the tapestry of human experience. … Continue reading

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Bah, HumTurkey!

Well, some of you meddlers have inquired about my plans for the so-called “Thanks-giving” holiday. I can assure you, I won’t be wasting my time with such frivolities as are expected in this day and age, when men can idle … Continue reading

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As God is my Witness, I Thought Turkeys Could Fly

These words were spoken by Les Nessman on the ancient TV show “WKRP in Cincinnatti”. He was running a Thanksgiving radio promotion and released a huge rafter of turkeys out of an airplane, where they plunged to their deaths. It … Continue reading

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